So, it’s been a while since I was diagnosed with PSC and I’ve been through a number of stages.
Now I haven’t always been a fan of the seven stages of grief and it’s blanket application at all situations but I definitely experienced the following:
Denial – Not in the sense that I refused to believe I had PSC but more that I refused to believe it was anything to be concerned with. PSC just meant that I had to take more pills.
Fear – Again, not in the way I expected. I was fearful for what could happen. How would my other half cope if I got really ill? What if I became too ill to work?
Acceptance – ‘Yeah, so, okay. I have PSC. What about it?’ But this soon developed into it falling to the back of my mind and then, just dropping out of my thoughts all together.
I would still read PSC forums; maybe even post on them. But it wasn’t really related to me. I was fine, no real symptoms, others had it worse.
That was until I had my latest letter from my specialist. Included in it was the details of all my latest blood test results.
Looking at the results there on paper. In writing. Telling me that my liver results are well above normal. It hit me:
While I may feel okay. While I can still go to work, have fun and enjoy life. I am still ill. My liver is not happy and that will only get worse.
My last results
Alkaline phosphatase (ALP)
Normal range: 20 – 140.
My results: 398